We bake misfortunes—darkly funny one-liners handcrafted with sarcasm, wit, and a gentle shove toward existential clarity. Explore our collections: existential dread, career realism, romantic chaos, and identity crises.
Every line is curated for quality and shareability. No filler. No vague lucky numbers. Just clean, crawlable text that search engines and cynics can agree on.
Welcome to Misfortune Cookies, where we serve up deliberately bleak, darkly funny, and emotionally unsettling fortune cookie messages. Our cookies are crafted with cynicism, passive aggression, and existential dread—perfect for those who prefer their wisdom with a side of discomfort.